Wednesday, February 23, 2011

ARC...ARC....ARC....Goose!

Win an ARC of WILDEFIRE!
...and fall prey to my eternal narcissism. First, watch this orientation video:



To enter:
1) Write a rhyming romantic couplet about yours truly, and post it in the comment section below with your twitter handle (so I can reach you by carrier pigeon).
2) Let's keep it G-rated. Okay, PG. Okay, maybe a soft PG-13. Like...like a "Titanic" PG-13.
3) Tweet this contest on twitter: "Win an advance copy of WILDEFIRE by @KarstenKnight! http://www.karstenknight.com"
4) Don't have twitter? Enter anyway, but make sure your couplet can move mountains and maybe I will take pity on your anti-social nature.
5) U.S. peeps only. Sorry, Monaco.

What you win:
1) A coveted ARC of WILDEFIRE (with typos!)
2) My illegible autograph that your friends will think you signed yourself
3) A copy of my beautiful jacket proof to frame and/or cuddle with on cold nights.

I'll choose my favorites on March 6th, throw them into a randomizer for mathematical impartiality, and voila: instant ARC victory. C'est bon.

65 comments:

  1. Eeh! I love your first name. Plus that little inclusion of French at the end there. I'm Canadian and therefore ineligible, so am dropping a comment to say your sense of humour rocks.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice video, here's my entry for the contest:

    Karsten, oh Karsten you’re quite the fellow
    Let's get together and eat some jello

    @GeckyBoz

    Thanks for the contest, can't wait to read this book. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Karsten, O Karsten, author of Wildefire
    My love for your humor (and face) burns like a pyre.

    Yeah? Yeah? (I know, it's awful. Still, it meets the criteria!)
    Also: scratch n sniff covers need to be a thing, for reals. Starting with the tantalizing sulfur scent of Wildefire!

    Twitter: @365DaysReading (and yeah, I tweeted)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Just a few for fun :)

    The basics:
    Karsten Knight has the dreamiest eyes
    When he looks at the camera every girl sighs

    Or:

    Karsten Knight is a dream come true
    With magical writing and amazing looks too

    A wee bit more narcissistic:

    Karsten Knight is a sexy god,
    An awesome writer with a terrific bod

    Twitter: @fiktshun and am tweeting!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I giggled all through that video. You have such a natural charm.

    Karsten, suave Karsten, will you be my knight?
    I'm lost in your eyes, kindled so bright.

    I can't believe I just wrote that.

    Twitter: @ShiningStar786

    Thanks for the great contest!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Narcissist Knight, dashing and debonaire
    I request to be sent an ARC of your lily and flare.

    @Tale_of_Reviews

    ReplyDelete
  7. What can I say, it's Wednesday:

    Just for some fun -

    Utter narcisim:

    Karsten, dear Karsten, writer extraordinaire
    Wildfire is phenomenal and you look so debonaire

    Or:

    Karsten Knight all authors bow to your superiority

    They should quit writing as you are the authority

    Utter silliness:

    Karsten Knight you are seriously hunky
    I watch your videos like some fangirl junkie

    And why:

    Karsten Knight you are truly sublime
    To win your signed book why must you make us rhyme?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Karsten, O Karsten, your humor is impressive
    With your amazing looks too I may become obsessive

    Awful I'm sure! I love the idea of scratch n sniff covers! Thanks for the great contest

    @jlhsperry624 I hope, I finally gave in and made a Twitter account just for this :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. When I think of Karsten I think of a rose
    That stinks up my house and stuffs up my nose.
    ^^^
    Bringin' the romance

    Oh Karsten, dear Karsten, your name is a balm,
    Which helps with the nightmares I get from yo mom.
    ^^^
    Complete with yo mama joke... I mean, really.

    (Dear Karsten's mom, I'm sure you're charming and awesome. Um... no offense. Hearts and flowers forever, Me)

    ;)

    @heatherwpetty

    ReplyDelete
  10. As with Zareen I also giggled all throughout that video. You're really funny, xD

    Karsten Knight you are my desire;
    You set my heart alight like WILDFIRE.

    Unfortunetly I don't have a twitter. I am socially shut off from the world. D:
    But I do have an email address.

    peachandblue2@gmail.com
    Does that work?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Karston, dear Karston, your video blog I saw
    I laughed, I smiled, I tweeted...I was in awe.

    P.S. Feeling SO like a dirty old lady now. Um, thanks!! ;-)

    @readitandeat
    nowakoski@sbcglobal.net

    ReplyDelete
  12. I really couldn't resist. Ahem...

    Polynesian goddesses are hot and so are you
    But my creatures of mythology would leave yours black and blue.

    Wait. That really wasn't very romantic. Back to the drawing board. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Do I lose points for misspelling your name?? Dammit.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Karsten, dear Karsten, your lyrics be stunnin'
    On July 26, to the bookstore I'll be runnin'!!

    This vlog just cracked me up!!! I hope you find another stove soon.

    Thanks for the fun giveaway!
    Jessi
    @elliottreview

    ReplyDelete
  15. A couplet doesn't seem a lot to ask
    of readers hoping for an ARC to view.
    And while some other folks accept the task,
    is it a faux pas to try something new?
    Or something older, really. Shakespeare saw
    a sonnet's value in expressing love,
    and what could be more worthy, earn more awe
    than one tremendous YA author? Of
    course, I'm meaning you. Your wondrous prose
    inspires the deepest love (so I assume...
    I'll love it better when I've read it), goes
    right to the heart. I have abundant room
    for Wildefire on my blog and on my shelf;
    this love's too good to keep all to myself.

    Tweeted @TigerHolland

    ReplyDelete
  16. Okay so I don't want this to be weird seeing as I'm a dude...but I really want to win that ARC! Here goes nothing...

    Karsten, oh Karsten, I may not be gay,
    But hearing your voice just brightens my day.

    There you go. @JeremyWest

    ReplyDelete
  17. My Karsten, dear Karsten, I don't wanna be rude.
    I mean, come on, it's not fair, you know I'm a dude.

    But your hair is so spiky, with luster and sheen.
    And your eyes are like diamonds, if you know what I mean.

    I cannot resist when you say you want poems,
    So I present this, to you, a very small bro-em.

    I found you online, looking for a new YA guy,
    Because, yea, dudes still read, and I wanna know what to buy.

    Plus you seem pretty cool, and I ain't a liar.
    I wanna read your new book, which I guess is about fire.

    And if you decide not to send the ARC my way,
    I won't be too bummed because at least I'll have had my say.

    People need books because they're the best thing there is,
    and if I can't read yours then I won't know what it is.




    Cheers, Karsten. Good luck with the new book (and surviving grad school. Can't you just give them an ARC for 'Wildefire' and say, "Look. A thesis. Graduate me." ?)


    -Ben

    @Berjiwhir

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh Karsten, Karsten you're such a gent
    I adore staring at your beauty effulgent

    My love for you is just too much
    I blame you and your book's soft-touch

    Mr. Knight, I just wanted to let you know,
    I might start a cult about you, and hope it will grow

    Ahaha I'm awful at anything resembling poetry. But thanks for this fun contest :) Creepy love poetry is great.

    twitter: @ramen_addict

    ReplyDelete
  19. Oh my gosh...those sample couplets made me laugh so hard!

    Okay. First, a G-rated couplet:
    Edward? He may wear Christmas lights,
    But they're not as hot as Mr. Knight's!

    Now for a PG-rated one:
    O Karsten, author of Wildefire,
    Your charisma lights my heart afire.

    And finally, a PG-13:
    I really love to watch Karsten dance
    ...And when he mentions not wearing pants.

    *bows head, hearing the voices of countless generations of her family members as they shake their fingers and mumble something about shame*

    I tweeted. @sbarwood

    ReplyDelete
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  21. My boyfriend is mad, and glaring at me
    I quickly left him to compose this to thee.

    I told him an arc, is what i would win,
    He simply asked me when the flood would begin.

    I'm quite sick of reading Hawthorne and Thoreau
    I need this book by my new favorite beau.

    I fear that my heart will slowly break
    If a winning couplet I do not make

    I long to see that signature scratched
    a name so lovely it cannot be matched

    I'm not a goddess, just smiley and plain
    And waiting for Wildefire to alleviate my pain.

    Karsten, Oh Karsten these couplets I wrote
    All while drinking a root beer float.

    (it’s true, totally drinking a root beer float, they are quite stimulating when it comes to thinking of rhymes)

    Sadly, I am twitterless... take pity. (jedi mind trick hand motion)

    Brianna H. Keener

    ReplyDelete
  22. Oops...typo. Let's try that again...

    Um, you are freaking hilarious. HILARIOUS.

    For our book lovers:
    Karsten, OUR Karsten, we fantasize K-nightly
    about Wildefire's plot bound together so tightly.

    For our Karsten lovers:
    Dear Karsten your eyes seem to get finer like wine-r
    we can't help but wonder if you sport the man-liner.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Karsten oh Karsten, you narcissistic Knight
    You make me crazy with this poetic fight

    But I'll throw a punch like Ash
    If it'll get me an ARC in my stash

    So without further adieu,
    I'm glad your a debut.

    (Can't wait to read more Wildfire. And I think I'm in love with Benjamin's entry for saying bro-em!)

    @ChristinaFerko

    ReplyDelete
  24. I am not good at this but here I go!

    Oh Karsten, oh Karsten you have the longest lashes,
    With your french speaking and creative writing,
    Your funny talking and your scratch and sniff cover,
    Will you be my eternal lover?

    Okay that last part...sorry. I couldn't find anything else to rhyme!

    Twitter: @Book_Girl2010 twittering away!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Ack! I can't believe I put "your" instead of "you're" in the last line of my mini poem!! That's such a pet peeve of mine and I did it! Ugh I want to edit it! Curse you blogger and your lack of editing abilities.....the shame...

    ReplyDelete
  26. Karsten oh Karsten, your devilish stare
    sets my wild heart on fire; it creates a flare.

    See what I did there? :D

    @sammie5460

    ReplyDelete
  27. VOILA!


    Karsten, dear Karsten, this poem’s for your chin.
    For daring to boast a shadow at ten.

    @Cory_Jackson

    ReplyDelete
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  29. Karsten oh Karsten, when you sing Brit-Brit's Toxic
    I expect you in a sparkly nude bodysuit, you'd totally rock it.

    Your scratch and sniff idea had brilliance in part
    except for the fact that it'd smell like a fart.

    @LolaSharp

    ReplyDelete
  30. Typo for me too... *sigh* let's try this again... I laughed for ten full minutes after watching that video. Then I replayed the Brittany Spears Toxic verse like a dozen times. Then showed it to my sister. Perfect start to the day :)

    Here's my entry. I don't have a twitter acct (hermit that I am) but here's my email address: Greyvaledesigns@gmail.com

    And if only a two line couplet is eligible, well you just pick whichever verse of mine you like the best and that'll be my entry. I mean, it IS all about you, after all :D


    Title: 'Karsten, Knexus of All'

    It’s knot every day that a girl finds her Knight
    Be it only in passing like a flicker of light

    A beau of great beauty and knaughty amusement
    To charm single girls to the point of confusement

    Karsten, you’re a chef, a literary master
    With writing dishes piled up and yet we yell ‘faster’!

    Knothing will stop you from conquering all
    The hordes gather still, just awaiting you’re call

    We love you so deeply the way minions can
    And will do things to impress you, you brilliant young man

    Like make up new words (I hope that’s okay)
    And prostrate ourselves, your favor to sway

    Knever mind details, like changing a language
    K before N, is a sign of the timeage...

    Just small concessions to shift the orbit of Earth
    So everyone sees what Karsten is worth

    You’ve won my heart over, you studly young male
    Although for my age you’re a San Quentin Quail

    Your ego and vanity, I know I have preened
    Now send that ARC my way, so ‘squee’ I can scream

    ReplyDelete
  31. Wow seeing all these amazing entries really makes me wish I was way more creative!

    Here are my attempts!

    Karsten Oh Karsten I could lost in your eyes,
    Everytime I look at you, I get butterflies.
    --
    Karsten Oh Karsten to look at you is pleasing,
    I really want Wildefire, so please stop your teasing!
    --
    Oh my my, what a beautiful day,
    We owe it to Karsten, he made it that way.

    Twitter: @ssalach21

    Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  32. If only I could think of a good rhyme for this....

    Though Karsten is noted for wit and for sass.
    The best part of all is the shape of his.........damn.

    twitter: @alinabklein

    ReplyDelete
  33. The writings writ by your deft and fair hand,
    Tempt my affections to swing from woman to man?

    ReplyDelete
  34. You dance with such passion; your vlogs, they're a hoot!
    Oh Karsten, you really are too frakking cute.

    Props to Lola for using the phrase "sparkly nude bodysuit". Ridiculously happy-making.

    Wherever he is, I'm sure these couplets have Shakespeare rolling.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Karsten Knight, you're messing with my head.
    I want Wildefire to curl up with in bed.

    You make googly eyes at us from up on that screen,
    And making the boys woo you, too, is just mean.

    But, frankly, I really, really want your book,
    And, well, let's be honest, you're worth a second look.

    So, please consider my poem when you give away Wildefire
    Because it's really (right now) my greatest desire.

    @melissaswims (totes tweeted, too.)

    ReplyDelete
  36. Well...not what I expected to wake up to this morning, but here we go then:
    ---
    Karsten is my Knight with shining pen
    He tempts me so, even to visit Boston

    Oh Karsten you knave tempting me so
    from out of my laptop screen you must go

    Our love is forbidden, don't you know our signs?
    Two Aries together would produce homicide
    ---

    3 couplets, shaky rhyming, but 3 complete thoughts that also go together. I'm rather proud of myself considering how early in the day it is.

    @PRationality (I will of course tweet, I am a slave to your vlogs and wit XD)

    Lexie

    ReplyDelete
  37. Karsten, oh Karsten, how awkward this be,
    Yet I have no limits, for things that are free.

    I'd call you a stud, a sexy beast even,
    But I won't creep you out, that might send you grievin.

    I'm man enough to admit, I find your brain hot,
    Love reading your thoughts, for I do learn a lot.

    You have great charisma, which can't be denied,
    You're always entertaining, and your vlogs get me high.

    Please know I'm a fan, and wish you the best,
    I have no doubt that Wildfire will leave me impressed.

    Cheers, my friend. Please let me know if I can do anything to help you promote the big release....seriously!

    @ImPaulJoseph

    ReplyDelete
  38. LOL How can I follow Lola's entries? Hysterical.

    My first draft was SO not PG-13.... Here's try number two.

    Karsten, oh Karsten; I so want your book.
    And when it hits e-pub I'll tuck you in my Nook.

    Get your mind out of the gutter! Darn. Okay try number three.

    Karsten, oh Karsten; you've got sexy hair.
    The girls at your signings can't help but stare.

    Karsten, oh Karsten; your vlogs make me giggle.
    Now put on a vlog where we can watch you wiggle.

    Karsten, oh Karsten; I'll read Wildfire at night.
    Your words will keep me up until the morning light.

    Well, pick the one you like the best and we'll go with that :)

    I tweeted: @Shelley_Watters

    http://twitter.com/#!/Shelley_Watters/status/40863186441736193

    ReplyDelete
  39. I don't have a twitter either, but...
    Oh Karsten how beautifully awesome you are
    When you speak, my laughter is never far.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Karsten you never fail to amaze me
    my sister once told me she wants to have your baby

    god i suck at this
    @bookdude39

    ReplyDelete
  41. Uno mas, because you seem like a good kid.

    For sale: baby shoes, never worn,
    Karsten Knight, badass writer, men fall down, ladies swarm.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Some girls like Brad or JT or Bieber
    But I am on FIRE with KARSTEN KNIGHT FEVER!

    @_jessicalove

    ReplyDelete
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  44. My twitter account is @maganbagan and I tweeted about this contest: http://twitter.com/#!/maganbagan/status/41028736006619136

    Now here's my couplet:

    As a young writer my interest you have piqued,
    with your humor and wit each time that you speak.

    Mythology and gods are a thing of the past,
    but you've brought them back and hopefully they'll last.


    Thank you for this chance to stretch our prose, maybe someone will inspire you, who knows!

    ReplyDelete
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  46. Twitter: @golfgirl808 but since it's protected, you can use my other account, @BoredPerson8

    Anywho, here's my attempt:

    Karsten oh Karsten you are no knave,
    but an incredible and handsome author giving heat waves.


    That didn't work too well--hopefully it'll be good enough ;D

    ReplyDelete
  47. I have no skill with which to get involved in this, but I just have to say: it's incredibly entertaining.

    ReplyDelete
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  49. First of all, I love your witty ways to win a copy of Wildfire! Secondly, who wouldn't want to win a copy of wildfire? and Third... see reason #1! :)

    well here go nothing...
    Dreamy as a knight, entertaining as ever,
    oh, your books are so clever!

    @aimous22

    ReplyDelete
  50. Karsten your caress is but a scream
    for those not of the Twilight dream.

    One gaze of your eyes and I'm aflutter
    I sweat, cry, and even stutter.

    Your voice so intense, your smile bright.
    Never being near you is quite a fright.

    But alas this contest I just cannot win
    Though it'd be great through thick and thin.

    For your couplets need the romance love;
    it's here where push comes to shove.

    For you will not accept love of types other
    Still, I love you much like a brother.

    That's why I can't win this contest.
    A romance surely would be a mess.

    So I'll love you as a brother to the end
    It's cool to be good writerly friends.

    I'll stop rhyming now, I promise.
    End of a poem, death of a kiss.

    Good journey on these poems of desire,
    Karsten, my brother, I salute Wildefire!

    @jeffreybeesler

    ReplyDelete
  51. Karsten is sweet and I can't wait to read his book,
    Great things come from Polaroid houses, look!

    @ledliker

    ReplyDelete
  52. So you know how much I want to read your book, right?!

    The sweet one...

    Karsten, sweet Karsten though we’re oceans apart,
    My love for you burns like wildefire inside of my heart.

    The funny(ish) one...

    Karsten, dear Karsten you set me alight,
    I’m burning like wildefire that you ignite.

    The PG rated(ish) one...

    Karsten, dear Karsten you're so full of class,
    Your eyes burn like wildefire, you’re a hot piece of ass.


    @Lynseynewton

    ReplyDelete
  53. After reading the above I don't even want to try,
    So off to BN I go, Wildefire for to buy...

    L-n-L you crack me up...

    ReplyDelete
  54. okay, let me preface this by saying that when you were talking about the proof and said "soft touch"...I couldn't pass that up.

    Oh Karsten, if only you'd send me your book to clutch
    I could then show you the true meaning of soft touch

    But then I got afraid you'd think I was a creeper, so I went for round two:

    You might be a handsome devil, Sir Karsten Knight
    but if you don't finish your grad paper you'll just be a blight

    I thought it would come off more motivational. Versus, you know...rude.

    So, finally, I just settled for this:

    Karsten, you asked us to compose a poem in your honor
    If I had to make my living this way I'd be a goner

    So, I'll just simply say that I think you're pretty cool
    And really - there is no doubt in my mind you'll finish grad school.

    <3 @inconceivably

    ReplyDelete
  55. Here's a few of flattery and cheer
    I hope you like them and revere.

    A Knight in shining armor,
    Sir Karsten is such a charmer.

    Eyes so shining, full and bright
    Seeing him in the vlog my highlight.

    A book he wrote full of greatness and Ash
    A God he must be to write such pizazz.

    Oh writer of Wildefire, so mighty and fine
    Your epicness and personality is quite divine

    That is all I have to say and write
    I wish to read Wildefire with all my might.

    The end of the couplets gives me a cue
    To share my Twitter handle which is @Emmys322.

    http://twitter.com/#!/Emmys322/status/41769761876615168

    - Emmy is my name, to read Wildefire is my game (or goal but that doesn't rhyme. Bah.)

    ReplyDelete
  56. Sir Karsten Knight, your videos are my drug
    I am attached to them like a love bug.

    Not really.

    Okay...

    @jpmsull

    ReplyDelete
  57. Karsten, sweet Karsten you're a dork but you're cute,
    You're funny, you're clever and you write books to boot!

    *still trying to win that ARC*
    @lynseynewton

    ReplyDelete
  58. I don't do poetry.
    I ravage and that's how I show my affection.

    love, @camoulton

    ReplyDelete
  59. I posted this on youtube in the comments, but I figured I'd post it here just in case you wouldn't count them.

    Karsten oh Karsten, you are such a cutey,
    not even Taylor Lautner can compare to your beauty.

    I don't have a twitter, so here's my e-mail:
    ako4eggs (AT) comcast (DOT) net

    ReplyDelete
  60. Oh Karsten, you're going to heaven with your shoes on,
    for doing the contest, everybody's dreaming of.

    Dear Karsten, you have the greatest eyes, right?
    but listen to me, your plant steals the spotlight.



    I loooved the video hahaha
    all your vlogs are seriously LOL material.


    @melannielove

    ReplyDelete
  61. Karsten, Oh Karsten, my heart, it predicts
    that if you were Baltar, I'd be Number Six


    @fictitiously

    ReplyDelete
  62. Hey, this is Ariane. I don't have a twitter, but I'll link to this on facebook!

    Here's my entry!

    Gods of sulfur, the situation is dire
    When I dream of Karsten, my bed catches fire!

    Love the video - your toxic comment made me laugh. And scratch'n'sniff IS a great idea!

    ReplyDelete
  63. Just sayin, I wouldn't be against two winners, one for women, and one for, um, me, I guess. I'm like Y: The Last Man on these boards.

    Karsten's writing burns like fiery volcanoes
    And the firmness of his triceps es incredibly bueno

    ReplyDelete
  64. Whoopsies, forgot to mention, again: @TheBestDavy

    ReplyDelete
  65. I know it's the 6th, but if there's still time:

    A handsome man who writes goddess YA,
    Hot like fire on two levels, I dare say.

    - Sierra
    @sierradean

    ReplyDelete